Unstable

Time for shits and stuff.

today i am gonna talk about life.

i am extremely down since yesterday. i hate being like this. why i have to go through so much shits?

i am sad. what? the ugly truth?

damn. i can't force a smile on my face at all.

I AM SO FREAKING SAD.

i bet i gonna be emo for the whole week. i don't know what's wrong.

i just don't know why it has to be so bothering me.

how am i gonna be happy when the one that made me sad is the one that can cheer me up?

sigh.

i don't know why that i love her so much that sometimes i can't fall asleep at night.

that thing in my heart. damn. i can feel the pain.

i thought you are different. but sometimes you prove me wrong.

i hate to see that you and her are just the same. can you actually understand how i feel?

i never want to compare but sometimes you leave me no choice.

why? why you have to be like this? living with not making up your mind.

i hate myself getting drunk and saying things that i don't wanna know.

and now, i am lost.

i don't know what i want anymore.

you made me feel that i had make the wrong decision. but again, i am still helplessly in love with you.

is it my fault that i think like this? or maybe i am just not moving on?

do you know that you actually mean so much to me that i can't even imagine myself being like this just because of you?

maybe i should just get a week and think about this. i really got no mood at all.

i seriously hate myself doing things that i not suppose to. but yet i can't control myself.

i don't know. i am really tired of this.

okie. hopeless zoie, maybe you are right. i really agree with what you said.

you should know what am i saying here.

today, i am actually very down. i don't feel like talking to her man.

but hopelessly, i wanted to see her so badly, that i actually went to her college there, chilling at the starbucks with wei yin. why? cause i just want to see her.

what is wrong with me? i really can't explain this.

a big big SIGH.

i think i should force myself to sleep as i need to wake up early tomorrow.

i should keep myself busy. but that doesn't mean it can stop bothering me.

sadness betul.

i am so broke recently. and yet i am jobless.

damn. CEO of MOH betul. freaking hopeless.

i seriously feel like slapping myself.

the end.

* Hate me but i love you.