XXX

I has been really busy last week.

packed with activities almost everyday.

yum cha like 3 days in a row.

damn.

is already 15th december.

so darn fast huh.

come on.

christmas is already next week.

till now, i am still jobless.

so hopeless la.

probably recession huh.

that's sad.

maybe i wanna find job at other place.

don't wanna be in this fucking midvalley.

dumb-ass.

especially those with big mouth.

or perhaps they have nothing better to do so wanna gossip about other people.

lame childish ass.

grow up la please!

so free to gossip about people stuff, go do more sales better.

hate all this stupid dumb people man.

not only that, somehow people listen to gossip pun.

fuck them.

so free meh, go get a life please.

even worst is those childish people, wanna added you as a friend then delete you away.

please, kid huh?

i don't wanna friend you, you don't wanna friend me ar?

fuck it ok.

fuck bitches.

whatever ok.

don't fucking mess with my life.

don't ever play with me, motherfucker.

don't make me piss.

fucking go burn up the whole fucking midvalley i tell you.

sue kao all of those childish shit people man.

never use their brain when they talk.

you guys think i am a bad person.

yes i am.

fucking happy now?

i am fucking bad ok.

since you guys said like that, i don't mind being worst.

how bad you want me to be?

come, i can play with you.

i am one fucking bad person.

don't make friend with me then.

i don't need dumb and no brain friend.

fuck it ok.

fuck away from my life.

i admit i am fucking pissed.

since yesterday.

ok, i am fucking tired to explain or to being a good guy.

don't like me then fuck off.

i don't need you in my life.

better still, no need to make me fuck around here.

fucking leave me alone ok.

fucking bitches.

fuck, fuck fuck.

hate it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

fuck girls !!!!!

no offense ok.

those bitches really got no brain.

especially those small girl.

fucker.

think i am dumb huh?

fuck away ok.

without you i won't die one ok.

i don't need bitches in my life.

fuck off far ok.

don't fucking talk so much ok.

don't fucking talk so much about my life.

you got no right to talk about me.

get it, bitches?!

don't make kao me crazy.

this post gonna be parental advisory ok.

fucking ciaoz.

word of the day = niamalanjiaozibaitiuhaifuckerhamlanbitchesfuckhai*

Jay @ fucking

Feelings

Sometimes hard work is not good enough.

God wants us to learn.

learn from everything we do, or what we had been through.

especially is that learn from our mistakes.

i learnt my mistake.

somehow, i guess is kinda late.

sometimes when you changed, every other things changed as well.

so you are not the only one that change.

feeling comes and goes.

that depends on how you treated it.

some feelings are hard to forgo but some are just so easy to let it go.

somehow, some feelings are so hard to gain but some are just so easy.

Why do we fall in love?

not because we want someone.

is because we want to share our love with someone else.

Falling in love with someone is not an easy task.

Everyone might have different taste in the person they love.

Every one of us will have different reason of why we love that someone.

The power of love is just so magical.

Why am i writing all this?

you think i got nothing better to do?

well, whatever i wrote here, is related what happened to me today.

Today suppose to be a fine day.

as i hang out with friends and yea, i saw her today.

so i was suppose to happy about.

but somehow, bad news always come at last.

i seriously don't know how to write it here.

i was just so hurt.

the text that she sent to me, it was fucking hurt.

i understand that she is just being honest with me.

but........................

come on, i just hate it.

tears flow.

fucking man, i hate being like this.

this is no joke ok.

i was trying hard, to change and be a better guy.

but somehow, should i say i am late?

well, i guess people gonna scold me dumb for this.

somehow, fucking honestly,

from my heart, i love her.

if is not because of this, you think she will make such impact on me?

i doubt this for quite some time.

i just somehow don't confirm it.

sighness~

my goodness.

i was late.

it was my fucking fault.

what should i do now?

i fucking stoned for a while.

not knowing how.

those physical and mentally pain from my heart is killing me.

I am fucking the sad.

how to club tomorrow?

how to recover?

fuck!!!!!!!

Nobody understand.

even god doesn't wanna give me a chance.

what can i say more then?

this month is just one blardy month.

sighness~

i guess i should just stay home and do nothing.

she darn broke my heart.

i got no more heart now.

aiks.

sad till speechless now.

fuck it.

hate that i love you.

word of the day = love is hard to forgo

Jay @ broken hearted

Rehab

Out of sudden, i just felt like updating my blog.

=.=

since i am having such long holidays and as well as jobless now,

so i just gonna hang out with my blog more k.

Rainy day today~

those cold weather make me wanna sleep more.

somehow, i need to go to klcc.

what i hate most about is that, going Klcc when there are sales.

damn!

darn confirm my $$$ is gonna flow out like water.

so it expected, i bought a phone strap from Gucci.

well, i don't like this brand but somehow is darn cheap, okie compare to Prada.

which i spend like an hour in there, stressing with one to get.

and another thing i hate is going to Prada.

i love this brand.

most of their stuff attract me okie.

so i saw this wallet which is something like silver in color, but is too big for me.

but come on, i like the color!! but they only have it in wallet and card holder and not the money clip wallet!

so i was like "fuck!"

i badly wants it.

okie okie, enough of that.

guess i have to start budget myself.

jobless and having holidays.

if i continue to spend like that, holy shit! I can't imagine man.

aiks~

can someone just hire me?

sob~

and oh  yea, i bought a lacoste polo as well.

=.=

cuz they said gonna increase price next year.

okie, end of my shopping story.

not to forget, i am hanging out with my friends tomorrow.

aiks~

going to the gardens.

again =.=

i am thinking, why not i just buy an unit in the condo next to Midvalley, so that would be so convenient for me to get to Midvalley.

haha~

alright, this week, something for me to happy about.

is that, she talk to me again, i mean just yesterday.

hmm, do i consider myself lucky or what huh?

to be honest, i am happy.

yes pls, i was fucking the sad after she left me.

and even fell sick and i don't even know what's wrong with me then.

after all, everything that i have been through.

i know why am i not giving up.

i might have like, err you know like tons of girls.

but not all that i will crazy about.

okie, used to have only 2 girls that i really crazy about.

but now, she gonna be the third i guess.

i don't get it either, she is somehow different.

i told her that i won't give up on her.

but she asked me not to put so much hope on her.

is alright, i get it.

it was my fault, i mean i made her so disappointed with me back then.

obviously i have to gain the trust from her again.

so, what i must do is, behave pls.

haa~

is funny that i am always like this.

when am i gonna change?

i remember that, on the day which i watched "bolt" with bobok and parents.

it was a night show, so the show finish at about 11 plus.

but somehow, after the show, i was driving home.

my god, you should have see my face man.

i was fucking the emo.

i mean suddenly, i became fucking emo.

plus, i am listening to jay chou's album, okie that's it.

i cried. ( i know is a joke but come on, i was hurt okie!)

i was fucking hurt.

and pula, my sis wanna call me and kacau.

another time was at poppy.

dammit.

i guess few of them saw.

it has been nightmare.

i don't like to cry okie.

and i hate it.

but only happen for certain people and certain situation.

hmm, still cough like gonna die soon.

hopefully before wed, i will be better.

i don't hope to go club with cough okie.

i am not gonna dance and cough at the same time.

and okie, i am not gonna drunk on wed.

finally, milkshake, i have been waiting man.

can't wait to go club.

i wanna work and earn money and go club everyday.

haha~

i loves to club.

come on, release stress.

this week is one busy week.

packed with so many activities.

need to entertain my friends that came back from oversea.

aiks~

so sad.

can't eat most food and drink cold drinks.

hate it.

faster recover please.

at night, can't sleep pun.

sadness.

god please bless me.

make my life happier ok?

let everyone around happy too.

quite a long post huh?

hmm.

kok kok kok kok kok.

be confident and work hard for your life.

currently, in love with few songs.

"a little too not over you by David Archuleta"

"Just so you know by Jesse McCartney"

"T-shirt by Shontelle  feat the dream"

"Rehab by Rihanna"

"You make it real by James Morrison"

okie, not so emo right these songs.

...........................................

haven't bath yet.

sigh~

lazy man.

some more so cold weather.

miss her~

okie, sudah long enough.

update more next post.

ciaoz

word of the day = You make it real

Jay @ bored

Over

my blog has became an

Abandon site...............

okie.

finish finals and done with studies stuff, here comes the HOLIDAYSSS!!!!

3 months sem break.

break a leg man!

keep looking for jobs recently, just don't wanna stay home.

too much time at home will make me a mad man.

sighness~

time flies.

here we are, December.

reminds me of christmas.

white snow and presents.

but somehow, she left me.

left me here alone, regretting.

i hate her but i know is my bad.

i was late, late to make an action.

You know what, Jay. You sucks, you are just a fucking dumb guy.

i screwed up. too bad, so sad. No ones pity me.

No ones know how bad it hurts, no ones know how sad am i.

And No ones know How Important she is to me.

only i know. I know.

i am still not over her. 

She hurts me, badly.

just hoping that miracle happens.

is true that everyone deserve a second chance, just one more chance i need.

damn!

I am just useless.

haiz.

is too late, too late talking about this.

she wouldn't care anymore.

I am not longer that certain people.

memories, that's all.

i really do heart you.

word of the day = tell me why are you so hard to forget?

Jay @ regret