Astounding.

Omfg. I didn't study today.
I knew it. I just knew it.
distraction from facebook, blog, hereos and prison break enough to kill me.
I just can't bring myself to face the damn books.
Sighness.
I guess tomorrow still be the same.
hopefully on wednesday, i can study. =/

Fucking facebook is cacat now. Maybe because of the my room application.
my fucking computer is so pissing me off now.
not only is darn slow, also suddenly jam. *%&$#@
fucking download the anti spy ware already still the same.
damn, i think i have to fucking restart the computer later.
oh no. i have to wait till all my dramas finish download first.

gosh heroes season 2 is out. I am downloading it now.
i am so longing to see it man.
not only that, prison break season 3 too.
heard from my cousin that the gossip girl is not bad too.
err maybe after finals will gila watch dramas. lol
lost won't be coming out till next year.
Sighness. I just love those shows man.

Out of the blue moon, i watch television just now.
was switching channel to channel.
well only the few, mtv, channel v and E!
the night programme are usually just boring.
saw Rihanna "unfaithful" mtv.
is a nice song but somehow i just don't like it. Cuz of the err lyrics and if u look at the mv then u will know.
i should dedicate this song to her last time. lol

Lying on the bed this afternoon.
thinking about the girls that i "can't get".
first was "E" then "L".
i never tell E as i like her for 6 months.
but now nothing matters anymore. She is out of my mind already.
for "L", is somehow different. i like her just for a while.
but she is the girl that i really want. seriously man.
well english educated, rich, smart, friendly, loyal, pretty, nice body shape, understanding and so loving.
my goodness, tell me where to find girls like this.
i know i can never get her. i just know it.
sometimes i really wish i am him. he is so lucky to be her boyfriend.
seeing them so sweet and loving, i can only back off.

girls that once my girlfriend, all of them never meet the standard of my dream girl.
not to say that they are bad but they are just not right.
sometimes i really wonder why am i expecting so high. or to say so picky.
i am still searching for the girl that loves me more than i love her.
but till now, i can't even find one.
It always the same, me loving her more.
Sighness.

Girls now are getting more and more horrible.
not saying about their looks but just their personality.
those money diggers and bitches are everywhere.
bad education system or bad parental teaching i guess.
or to say is those advance media and lifestyle.
Sighness.

never think about her today.
i see her online in the afternoon so i don't know. i just never think about her.
she has been study hard, unlike me.
she came up with some funny fill in the blank message yesterday.
make me think the hell out of me.
those question is not hard but challenging.
i was on the way to airport and having a headache so i can't think of much.

Jen was saying that my msn personal message is so emo.
i was telling her that i always emo.
"kismet.fondness.euphoria.temperament."
does this sounds emo to u?
Sighness.
i am forcing myself to stay at home to study.
but i can't study.
hopeless guy. should go bang my head on the wall.
now i know why i lose to that farker. because i don't study.
he got good grades but i don't have.
this is the reason why i can't get her back u see.

i am a bad guy.
i know some girls love bad guys.
come and have a sweet talk with me. hahahaha.
desperately wanting to have a girl.
is time to let go, jay.

that's all.
ciaoz.

Jay @ complaining

Imprudent.

Bad headache just now.
Feeling better now, my throat still painful neither my ear.
Steal ice cream and eat just now. lol. I was really longing for it so badly.
Get to eat rice today and i ate 2 bowl of rice.
Gosh i am getting so skinny now. I really have no idea what happen.
everyone is saying that i am getting skinner and skinner, as if i am gonna die soon.
I am kinda worry about it. My aunt said gonna bring me for medical check-up.
Well we will see what is happening to me after the check up.

Went to movie this afternoon.
watch "brothers". A show with no ending. Sighness.
Wanting to watch 30 days of night. I guess gonna be after exam.
Oh yea my gila-ing cousin bought me Harry Potter.yea finally.
I guess i gonna put it aside first cuz finals coming.
I didn't even know what to study man.
Sighness. I am feeling so hopeless again.
Hopefully i don't repeat the whole semester again.

Suddenly miss the high school life so much.
all the fun and nonsense. I will never forget man.
Skipping class to play bball, skipping school for online game, sleeping and eating in the class, cheating during the exam.
This is what i called FUN.
Oh yea not to forget all the girls that i somehow related to.
wonderful memories in a stupid school. lol

I am getting emo again. yea Jay chou's songs.
Make me miss her. Sighness.
I shouldn't be doing this man.
I really can't find any reason to believe her.
even if is true, so what?
She is loving 2 people at the same time.
Then what did i get?
A good question that my friend came up to me,
she said "if she still loves u, then why she doesn't want to get back with u?"
It make sense. I really don't know man.
some friends said that she just wanna keep me by her side. U know i am those "too" good guy.
some people said she is using me. I never believe that.
Just wondering why is all my friend keep adding her up in facebook arh?

Telling her this problem is no use at all.
i don't know whether she don't understand or she is just running away.
all she would said is "haih...i don't know...haih...i sucks.."
Guess i really know her too well. That is why i don't really share my problem with her cuz i already know what her reaction gonna be.
well is better to let one people suffer then let 2 people suffer right?

I guess i am really a very good person.
people always bully me plus i always think for other people than myself.
If i got girlfriend even worst. All i think is for her only, never for myself anymore.
Is this an act of stupidity or being too good?
omfg pls don't tell me this is my personality man. if can't i change, how am i gonna be successful in the future?
I really have to hope that i went for check up, they said i have a tumor in my brain man.
yea i am running away.
as what grandma said, my dream comes true if i really die one day. lol

Sighness.
Gonna stay home tomorrow i guess. Yea study.
i hope i will.
hopefully nothing kacau me or get my attention away from my err books.
will update tomorrow, hopefully come up with something new cuz i think alot eveyday.
ciaoz people.

Jay @ confusing

Stillness.

I am back from this terrible sickness.
Nah actually still haven't fully recover yet.
but lot more better now.
I went to see doctor, yea again. for the third time.
This time cooler cuz i went to hospital. lol.
The reason why i can't recover is because for the second time i visit the doctor, they actually gave me medicine that is not original. Omfg, can u believe even medicine they have imitation one. Sighness.
So everytime after i took the medicine, i sure vomit like hell plus i didn't get to recover. Well now finally i know that expensive medicine is always the useful ones.

What a bad sickness. The worst i can say. Visit doctor for 3 times and i guess it already cost me around 300 bucks all together.
Sighness. Hopefully i can recover faster.
I have to eat porridge for like so many days and those medicine already making my tongue tasteless now.
Really feel like eating ice cream now!!!

My gila-ing cousin is so torturing me yesterday. Force me to teman her shopping. I already half dying plus so tired.
She just keep telling "You're the best!" =/
yesterday went to buy cakes for her. went ss15 thr and even puchong.
omfg, puchong road system are really bad.
no offense but they really causing more traffic jam i think.
well i guess i am gonna often there in the future or to said stay there.
get home about 7.15pm and wait for everyone to come for dinner.
What a warm family dinner. =)
my aunt actually prepared so many dishes and even got abalone. but i can't eat much either.
After dinner, eat cake.

then yesterday night can't sleep well man. vomit after eating the medicine.
the pain in my ear is killing me instead.
This morning no choice have to tell my aunt so went see doctor again.
Sighness. This few days eat medicine more than i drink coke. Miss drinking coke so much.
After i recover i must eat what i want!
suppose to follow my family to dinner tonight but because i can't eat those food then i can't go.
is alright. At least i stay at home and watch football.
Arsenal vs Man Utd.
Man Utd sucks man. they are such a cheater man.
Lucky is a draw match, if not i am piss till like hell already.
hmm seems like i am so supporting arsenal now. Just wondering.

Is alright, i can support both Chelsea and Arsenal.
Fabregas is the best man!!! I think because of him that is why i support arsenal now.
Hmm i guess i gonna start study next week man. if not, i also don't know what will happen.
Sighness. Holidays must go work lo.
Earn money and buy stuff!!!
My friends keep saying that i am bullshitting cause every time i said work but i never did.
Well not to say i really need to work but i want more money. Aiming for a new cellphone.
hmm kinda semangat now cause slept for like 2 hours plus in the afternoon.

Yor, wanted to go to that party in Qbar next week man.
but but but.....got exam plus still haven't recover.
Sighness. But the dress code is terrible.
After exam must Party!!!
Grandma already started her holidays.
wanna make a trip le. Must get everyone first because confirm everything.
Jay chou got new album already. Now i download first, sooner or later only i go buy.
listen to his songs make me emo man, especially those sad sad ones.
Gonna have a new dog soon. Hmm hopefully is not naughty like sable.

Let me check the results.
hmm chelsea won! not bad not bad.
Lampard scores again. What a good form he is now.
Throat still pain. Maybe shout too much just now because of the match.
that's all for today.
going for movie tomorrow.
ciaoz.

Jay @ admiring jay Chou's songs

You.

周杰伦 - 最长的电影

我们的开始
是很长的电影
放映了三年
我票都还留着
冰上的芭蕾
脑海中还在寻着
望着你
慢慢忘记你
朦胧的世界
我们聊了多远
樱桃花的缺
圈着了谁改变
如果再从来
会不会少些了美
爱是不是
不开口才珍贵
再给我两分钟
让我把记忆结成冰
别融化了眼泪的冲妆化了
要我怎么记得
记得你让我忘了吧
记得你叫我忘了吧
你说你会哭不是因为在乎

Jay Chou latest song. A nice one.

Infirm

I guess i am just came back from my dead.
Gosh, 2 days of sickness are already killing me.
Slept for like 20 hours yesterday, that is why i never update my blog.
Didn't even have the energy and my throat is killing me either.
I can't even swallow man. Is so fucking painful when i swallow.
Maybe the one stick on tuesday enough to kill me till now.

Went to see doctor for second time today.
hopefully my throat will be better tomorrow.
bad week i have.
probably if i die already, no one would know also.
Sighness.

Didn't want to think about her much now.
she just annoy me.

don't know what else to write here anymore.
update more when i am free.
ciaoz.

Jay@sicko~